New Year’s Resolutions to Hasten the American Resurrection of 2017

You already know the litany of New Year’s resolutions. Lose 20 pounds. Join a gym. Get in shape. Get a better job. Read more books. Start a new hobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We’ve made them and broken them before the season of Christmas is over.
These are different. Here are my political resolutions to hasten the coming American Resurrection:
- Go on a Political Diet. Let’s call it “The Hillary Diet.” It’s easy. Just stop the yapping over Hillary. Pretend she never existed. I’m going to do everything in my power NOT to say the word “Hillary”. Ever again. She’s a loser and she’s done. End of story. We’d like to do the same for Obama, but we know he will never ever leave D.C. They simply don’t have a moving van big enough to pack that man’s ego out of the White House. This brings me to Resolution #2.
- Start disciplined Political Exercise: Everything that Obama stood for has been defeated. He’s now been exiled politically. His third term was that Old Crone (see Resolution #1) and she lost big time. The Democrat Party has lost over 1000 political positions nationwide over Obama’s eight long, painful years. He’s shredding their party and it’s a great thing for us. Democrats should banish him and tell him to shut up but he is their idol. Since he won’t leave us alone and we can’t avoid the Soon-To-Be-Former President Obama entirely, we will treat him like the town drunk. You know, the guy in the gutter downtown who is screaming incoherent obscenities as people walk by. Unlike the drunk who is sadly the victim of his own vice, we cannot feel pity for Obama. We must walk by without feeling sorry for him. So celebrate the incoherent ramblings of a political exile. Encourage Democrats to continue worshipping their First Ever Black President Ideologue. Disciplined Political Exercise is to keep smiling as Obama keeps droning on and on and on. If this keep up, we’ll win more seats at the midterms in 2018.
- Engage in Judicious Political Reading: Read reputable conservative sites and blogs for real news. The Liberal Media is in its death throws. Even their Fake News stories about Russians hacking the election didn’t gain traction among voters. They are desperate to understand why millions of women in fly over country voted for Donald Trump when they should have voted with their lady parts in favor of the First Vagina to run for a major party. Stop listening to deluded sites like CNN, MSNBC, and the dinosaurs ABC, NBC, and CBS. Use the New York Times as a bird cage liner after you laugh at the comics page. Years ago I started calling them the Make-Believe Media because they make up the news and then they make you believe it. Don’t ignore the Make-Believe Media, just don’t take them seriously. They ARE the Fake News. Realize their job is liberal spin. Don’t let them ruin your day.
- Make a Political Vacation: Consider a trip to D.C. or Philadelphia to see the various birthplaces of American Exceptionalism. Take your kids to any historical site where Americans fought for freedom. Battlefields, reenactments, battleships if you’re in port cities. Go to a local air museum or railroad museum. Get familiar with American history because it is disappearing. The Left is erasing American history from history and rewriting it with globalism, multiculturalism and a centralized government educational systems.
- Get a Political Hobby: Learn how to shoot a gun. Go to a range. Get a shooting lesson. Take a Hunter Safety Class. Go skeet shooting or target practicing or hunting. It’s your Second Amendment Right. Learning to shoot a gun is cheaper than a movie and dinner out in most states (not California). Besides, it freaks liberals out when you bring up target practicing in conversation. So, if you’ve got ‘em, smoke ‘em.