Let’s Ban Everything!
Ban the guns, yes indeed, guns are weapons that, when used improperly, can kill and maim people. Even people who have gun permits with registered guns are not exempt from guns being used improperly. Everyday in the news, there are acts of violence with people using guns to cause havoc on others, so let’s ban the guns therefore we will be free from devastation and destruction in our daily lives.
Whilst we’re at it, let’s look at all of the other items to ban to keep folks safe. After all, it is the job of the government to prevent further calamity in our daily lives, right?
Years ago I recall a teenage boy using a fork to stab his brother in his arm, puncturing the arm severe enough to draw blood and leave holes in the arm. So let’s ban forks. We’ll need to ban pencils, too, as they are the root of many evils that have taken place. In the classroom children have been known to stab other children with pencils in the arm or leg leaving quite severe bruising. And let’s make sure to ban fake fingernails. I read somewhere that a female student dug her nails deep into another student’s arm deep enough to draw blood.
Glass containers, when broken by a student and/or thrown at an administrator in their office, should definitely be banned. For that matter, perhaps we should ban unruly students – that one is quite tempting as I have been kicked, spat upon, and punched by unruly students…And oh, yes, gotta ban furniture, too. I have seen students throw desks, and books, too. Books have been propelled across the room aiming for and meeting said target.
Irons not only injure people, but also leave lifelong scars on human skin, so we’ll just have to live with wrinkled clothes. And coat hangers can be immensely dangerous to mankind. The risks include stabbing and strangling the target. Many other items can be used as a weapon–cars being driven too fast, knives used to stab people, chemicals if used incorrectly, water – people drowning—and of course crazy people, but what defines crazy? Crazy people produce bombs from chemicals made at home – so what do we ban first, the chemicals, the home, or the crazy people? Poison of all types definitely needs to be banned because it can be used to eliminate folks. Marie Gonzalez-Angelo is a doctor who fatally poisoned her lover – no gun involved there. Some chemicals are capable of causing a fire because they are ignitable – think hairspray, nail polish remover, shaving cream, alcohol, and perfume are some of the items most of us have in our homes.
Flour and powered coffee creamer have also been to destroy buildings – good reason to drink black coffee right there. The flour particles build up, oxygen, and the right temperature can cause the flour to explode.
And of course, the government should ban all violent movies, games, and music videos including the main culprit of all violent-inducing propaganda, Hollywood, aka “Bullywood”.
Am I being satirical? Well, sort of. The above items are somewhat controlled with regulations in place to keep people safe, as are guns. Can a hammer build a building, can a pair of scissors cut by themselves, the answer is, of course, no, it takes a person using these items for the end result. Guns should not be banned, any more than forks and pencils. In every instance, it is people who use items to kill and maim others, not the other way around.
The mainstream media has been lacking on posting stories of the positive side of gun owners but the truth is that the vast majority of people who own guns are folks who abide by the law, something 72 year-old Jan Cooper fully understands. Mrs. Cooper fired one shot at an intruder in her home, forcing him to apologize before making a hasty getaway. Cooper also had a Rottweiler barking ferociously during this incident. The growling and barking dog did not stop the intruder but the appearance of the gun and one shot put enough fear into the intruder to back off.
Another gun owner stopped an intruder with a gun; the intruder was shot several times and died. A man was attacked at the gas station and it was his gun that prevented him from being shot. A father is able to protect his daughter from an intruder. (Many other instances can be found here and here.)
The government does not have the right to make decisions on what I choose to do and banning guns is never the answer. The government is there to help keep order– not to control its citizens.