Dating Across the Aisle

Ok, I’ll admit it, dating at my age (let’s just say 40 was “a few years ago”) is proving to be a lot more challenging than I thought it would be after my divorce.  When I think about what was so important to me in my 20’s and 30’s–Does he look good in jeans?  Are his friends cute?  Cool hairstyle–I have to laugh.  Now I’m just happy if the men I meet have any hair at all.

We all have some sort of baggage when we hit middle age.   Kids, ex-husbands or wives, alimony, child support, visitation – the list goes on and on.  But most of us still keep some type of “wish list” of qualities we hope our dates will have.  And on the flip side, there are some things that send up warning flags, things we absolutely cannot tolerate.

For me, I have made the decision that dating Liberal men is simply not good for my health and well-being. I can compromise on religion, football teams, TV viewing habits, morning person vs. night owl, toilet paper over or under, radio stations, even Turkey Hill or Edy’s – and that was a tough one.  But I cannot sit across the table from a Liberal man and say to myself “What difference does it make?”  (Hat tip to Hillary…)  I thought I might be able to handle men who describe themselves as “middle of the road” but they are all just using that to expand their horizons beyond liberal women.  They are Liberals in Moderates’ clothing.

At first I try to not bring politics into the conversation.  I ask fascinating questions about their jobs or their kids or their favorite vacation spot.  But how do you avoid it when every single conversation comes back to the miserable economy, the pitfalls of ObamaCare, the rising cost of gas, food, college, and just about everything else?  Liberal men just annoy me, and I tend to be more “socially” moderate.  I can’t stand men who are afraid of guns; men who don’t open doors for me; men who don’t get dirty and/or men who care more about their clothes than I do.

When I did some searching on the Internet, I discovered there are quite a few dating sites for like-minded individuals.  A few of them are: http://www.datingrepublicans.com/  and  http://www.republicanpassions.com/.

I have not personally joined any of them.  However if I do, expect a follow up a follow-up piece about my experiences.   Interestingly when I researched further, I found there are a lot more Liberal women who were “shocked” to discover they liked dating Conservative men than vice-versa.  Take this “bleeding heart” liberal who had this to say: “After one coffee, I sensed this man was different. He was intelligent, funny, kind, ambitious and insanely attractive.  But when I got home and looked at his online profile again, one word popped out that I previously overlooked: CONSERVATIVE.”

Or the case of a HuffPo writer’s disbelief that she is “actually in a relationship with a right-leaning man” and that “conservatives can be (*gasp*) intelligent sometimes.”

On the other hand, not one Conservative woman found herself swooning over a Liberal guy.  No Right-winger found herself leaning Left.  Not one Tea Party gal could stomach an Obama kool-aid drinker.

So I guess I am in some pretty good company after all.

Written by Debby Wolf